{"id":8546,"date":"2017-04-23T01:12:12","date_gmt":"2017-04-23T05:12:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/?p=8546"},"modified":"2021-10-19T11:12:20","modified_gmt":"2021-10-19T15:12:20","slug":"after-an-instant-not","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/","title":{"rendered":"After an instant, not"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"grid kcm\">\n<div class=\"grid__item one-whole portable--auto lap--auto palm--auto\">\n<pre>As I breathe, oxygen\r\ncomes in, I become what\r\nI breathe, yet I do not, \r\ncarbon dioxide goes out.<span id=\"easy-footnote-1-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-1-8546\" title=\"Without them, there is no us, but without us, there would still be a them, don't hug the trunk, hug the leafy me:  &lt;iframe src=&quot;https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/lzWUG4H5QBo&quot; frameborder=&quot;0&quot; allowfullscreen=&quot;allowfullscreen&quot;&gt;&lt;\/iframe&gt;\"><sup>1<\/sup><\/a><\/span> I&rsquo;m not what came in, I&rsquo;m not what left me yet I&rsquo;m both and none after an instant, not.<span id=\"easy-footnote-2-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-2-8546\" title='Oxygen finds its way into me, from gas to liquid, yet my sense of self remains intact, to pay constant attention to the exchange overwhelms: &lt;iframe src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/nRpwdwm06Ic\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"&gt;&lt;\/iframe&gt; '><sup>2<\/sup><\/a><\/span> As I dream, melatonin comes in, I become what I dream, yet I do not as forgetfulness reigns.<span id=\"easy-footnote-3-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-3-8546\" title=\"Melatonin makes us sleepy. When the lights dim, its empire begins to reign. \"><sup>3<\/sup><\/a><\/span> I&rsquo;m not what I dreamt I&rsquo;m not what I forgot, yet I&rsquo;m both and none after an instant, not.<span id=\"easy-footnote-4-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-4-8546\" title=\"There's a tick tock inside your brain, it turns on and off by the hour. So close to it is... to the pituitary, oh... stress might be near! It's cortisol. &lt;iframe src=&quot;https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/O0Uzy35uJzU&quot; frameborder=&quot;0&quot; allowfullscreen=&quot;allowfullscreen&quot;&gt;&lt;\/iframe&gt;\"><sup>4<\/sup><\/a><\/span> As I learn, memories come in, I become what I retain, yet I do not, as cortisol impairs me.<span id=\"easy-footnote-5-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-5-8546\" title=\"From dreaming to forgetting, from forgetting to dreaming... There's an oscillating dance: as soon as the cortisol bath is too hot, the hypothalamus signals to shut it down but if it gets too cold it signals the pituitary: Wake up the adrenal gland! \"><sup>5<\/sup><\/a><\/span> I&rsquo;m not what's learnt, I&rsquo;m not what&rsquo;s felt, yet I&rsquo;m both and none, after an instant, not.<span id=\"easy-footnote-6-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-6-8546\" title=\"But sometimes there's too much stress. I can't sleep. I can't concentrate. Was it the lack of sleep that started it or was it the stress? What was first the feeling or the thought? \"><sup>6<\/sup><\/a><\/span> As I fade, a why do I? comes in, I became what I thought, yet I&rsquo;m not as the knot that kept me alive unties itself.<span id=\"easy-footnote-7-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-7-8546\" title=\"Why do you need to order who came first? If you find the guilty one, it won't change what you felt and later thought or thought and later felt. \"><sup>7<\/sup><\/a><\/span> If I was what I felt, was what I dreamt, was what is learnt, with my last breath, after an instant, not.<span id=\"easy-footnote-8-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-8-8546\" title=\"Fear and stress, what a pair! I'm now afraid I won't sleep. I'm diluted in the memory of a previous night. What keeps you awake is not what is happening, but what happened or could happen.\"><sup>8<\/sup><\/a><\/span> And yet I still linger as images in your mind about who I was, what would I hold true, assuming what I would have but you never could, because I never could even when alive pinpoint who I was after a second.<span id=\"easy-footnote-9-8546\" class=\"easy-footnote-margin-adjust\"><\/span><span class=\"easy-footnote\"><a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/#easy-footnote-bottom-9-8546\" title=\"Why, you, dreaded stress... Why can't you keep me away from eternal sleep? And because you can't, I'll run toward the embrace of ephimeral life. I'll find a way to ignore you as there's nothing more informative than a good night sleep after having learnt the most I could that day.\"><sup>9<\/sup><\/a><\/span> If I were alive, for an instant after my last thought, I would disagree with what I wrote yet after another, not.<\/pre>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>As I breathe, oxygen comes in, I become what I breathe, yet I do not, carbon dioxide goes out. I&rsquo;m not what came in, I&rsquo;m not what left me yet I&rsquo;m both and none after an instant, not. As I &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/after-an-instant-not\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8567,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3,1760,1759],"tags":[2039,551,1257,252,1509,1443,513,1510,1178,2036,1788,492,829,1895,50,1945,2038,1316,28,1678,2037,76,449,392,2035,1040,1127,169,69],"form":[1927,2014,1890],"genre":[1740,1932],"type_image":[1764,1563,1756],"type_audio":[],"type_video":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8546"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8546"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8546\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9157,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8546\/revisions\/9157"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8567"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8546"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8546"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8546"},{"taxonomy":"form","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/form?post=8546"},{"taxonomy":"genre","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/genre?post=8546"},{"taxonomy":"type_image","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/type_image?post=8546"},{"taxonomy":"type_audio","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/type_audio?post=8546"},{"taxonomy":"type_video","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/linaru.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/type_video?post=8546"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}